Bring booze and chicks. Separate, or one already in the other. Your call.
i'm officially boycotting relationships. hello random hook ups and treating men like meat.
I just answered "If only I knew" for a quiz in criminology, she loved it. I got an A
hahaha my homeschooled cousin put up graduation pictures. it's just her standing in front of her fire place. With a hand made diploma.
I need $500 dollars more than I need a night of dignity... I gonna do it.
It's like I opened a door and behind it lay mythical creatures sprinklin fairy dust upon the land leading me to a pot of gold. And that gold is some delicious cock.
How are ur friends?
One is peeing in the grass and the other is asleep under the stairs. Fuck them I'm sleeping in the car
I AM NOT THE MAN IN THIS RELATIONSHIP.
It's shit like this that makes people think we're gay.
Took "drink until he's cute" to a whole new level last night...
I wonder how he feels knowing that he's the one who turned me gay
I have no idea how but i got a hold of a blue food dye packet. And proceeded to rub it all over my tits. So yeah i'd say its safe to say i'll be known as smurfette for a while
We can't stop being roommates, you do such a good job of holding my hair back when I puke. I don't wanna buy hair elastics.
I tried to open a bottle of wine with toenail clippers last night. So this morning was obviously rough.
Remember the girl I had sex with in the dorm stairwell? She got married!
they gave me money. the money smells like weed. also they gave me weed
Randomize
