Doing final review now. Then epic shit. Then going to take it. Should start it be 1030. Done by 2. Drunk by 3. Hammered by 4. Blacked out by 5. Streaking by 6. Jail sometime after that
Sex on a trampoline was so worth getting a mosquito bite on my penis
Places you have drunkenly threatened to piss: my bed, my bros bed, my moms bed, my bros wedding
I keep having to talk dad out of putting tequila in the milkshakes.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you were sitting on your bed looking out the window, rocking back and forth naked, saying how peaceful it looked outside
If I were there, I'd be putting a martini in you, via funnel if need be, and you would be doing this thing.
I dont have any paper so I'm writing class notes on my first response direction pregnancy paper. Judging eyes are all around.
Its everclear night, yall need carbs in your body!
Well there is another shower in Nov. So I have three months to figure out how to get some drunk space fucking. May need some of your mead
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was just the victim of a drive by judging in a horse and buggy.
The fuck? Where?
St. Mary's. Amish people. Too high for this.
That BJ in the bathroom was definitely worth the $20 cover.
I guess I was blacked out I hopped a fence and hugged a cow that night.
Dude, my vagina feels like new again! I love antibiotics. How's your day?
She said she was sorry for rolling around in her own vomit. Honestly, I thought it really added to the party.
It's only considered alcoholism if you're drinking from something other than a cup....right?
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