This boy just came into class wearing sperrys and a polo but also carrying a longboard. I'm unequivocably attracted to his level of doucheyness.
i carry sandwiches in my pockets more than any normal person should
His search history includes homemade sex toys and a plunger. I'm scared about what goes on in their place.
He taped a champagne bottle to both his hands and called himself edward champagne hands. At one point he poured some on his lap and said " Just needed to make sure my dick got some too"
First sex of the summer I'm winning 1-0
GET HOME NOW
Oh shit
Are there any rules against fucking the hot TA?
Maybe for her....
Her problem, not mine
Lmfao. We asked what you wanted to eat and you said vagina. I don't care what kind. Fresh, barbecue, roasted on a camp fire. I just want it on my taste buds.
There was a huge crash. I came out of my room to find you sprawled out at the bottom of the stairs in your bra and panties. You looked at me, yelled 'WHAT AM I DOING WITH MY LIFE' and then ran back into his room.
He started a convo with me by saying that we went to high school together and then recommended I try meth.
"Do You Wanna Build a Snowman" came on while I was riding his dick. I had to take a moment.
I'm sorry your Amazon says buttplugs now
Stop calling him just to say, "my vagina misses you."
As much of a hooker as I am you don't slam where you drink
Jamie's fucking a senior citizen and I'm eating chips and salsa in the shower at 2am, so whatever you're doing it can't be worse.
The last thing I remember was them slipping shots into my beer bong, and me being happy about it
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