do you think they ever dumped Gatorade over Michael Vick's head after his dog won?
I just got hit by a car. I'm fine; I'll be to the bars in about 15
I never thought to pass out in a hotel lobby rather then paying for a hotel room until you taught me that's acceptable at the Hilton
My printer just jammed because one of the condom wrappers I threw when we had sex in my dorm
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He kept calling my vagina a magic clam, and it was speaking to him, telling him to feed it his penis. I played along.
I've been at work 30 min broke a paper towel holder a chair set a box on fire and fell down twice. Hungover Brian just reached a new level
I remember it because it was right after the sadness and right before the sluttiness. The calm before the storm if you will
We decided it was acceptable to walk out of class on a quest for Doritos. That high.
I yelled kanye while he was fucking me. It just felt right
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think I may be the only girl in the world that can say she has fallen asleep grasping a penis..... 3 different times...... 3 different penises
Go forth my friend, but don't do any of that fruitful and multiplying shit.
That was the night I realized I need to grow up and stop eating mushrooms with strange 40 year old men in convertibles.
I learned so much in Pittsburgh
TELL HER ABOUT THE GODDAMNED MOTHERFUCKING POTATOES
Opening my shipments of mascara and nipple pasties this morning like a boss bitch
Gotta love college... Pregamed for my 8:30 flight home this morning and gave the flight attendants all high fives when I got on the plane. Best ride of my life.
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