you know i think I know why you are single...because you are real cute but then you open your mouth and let words come out and all goes to hell.
just used a paint mixing cup as a shot glass. thank u art school.
You were petting your shoe and saying this makes me really happy
according to the random from alabama i slept with last night i kept saying "poor lil tink tink" over and over in my sleep
he just sent me a pic of him naked with a bucket of margarita mix hanging off his dick
EMERGENCY: IS A KAREOKE RICKROLL ACCEPTABLE IN THE YEAR 2011?
Going home with an argentinian named sulvio. Ill let you know how it goes.
Apparently suggesting that she was the kind of girl who might be expected to kill someone's pets hurt her feelings...
At one point I went looking for you and found you handcuffed to a chair. I'm pretty sure you handcuffed yourself. I don't know how you got there.
We are going to get clementines. And shoot them out of a ballon launcher. That's after we come up to the ivy with a bullhorn and reck havoc. Where are you.
It's official. This guy and I are going gay for each other. We're tasting the fucking rainbow.
Please come and kill me with a brick you dont even have to be nice about it just smash myfucking skull in this is the worst hangover ive had for at least a week
She just asked to come over. She's either going to bring one of her dads guns and kill me or we're going to end up having insane lesbian sex.
Remember that time a drunk Dracula took a shit in the urinal? Ooh, that's right, it was last night.
i don't think the phrases "so shitty" & "taking care of my newborn" should be combined in the same sentence. leave it to her to make it possible eh?
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