Racial profiling caused me to miss two cabs but the third cabs the charm - he's playing Jesus Music
She has 260 profile pics. In 260 she's ugly and in 255, she's making the peace sign with her hands...
i pounded out a 17-yr-old on saturday night
no, that is not a typo
i turned her down on fri night, googled the state consent laws & then caved on saturday
do you find it slutty that the last person I had sex with is also the person who sings my ringtone ?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Have you ever chugged beers in the hospital parking garage with your mom?
I'm surprised I haven't crapped out a leprechaun, I'm so hungover
my vagina hasn't met your boyfriend yet ... makes me sad
Back of his car in the Starbucks parking lot WITH HIS APRON STILL ON. Check and Mate.
Holy shit. You won barista bingo AND the Triple Crown in one day.
What kind of life do I lead that no one is surprised by the fact that I was watching porn at work with the hot 37 year old?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Drive by water balloon fight on $500,000 boats ended when someone threw a dildo
Yeah. Still not happy that my prof saw a picture of my vag.
I curse you to think about Guy Fieri whenever you have sex with your lady.
He ate me out while watching Fifty Shades of Grey---needless to say I'm locking this down
my roommate had drunk sex above me in our bunk bed and then built me a fort to apologize the next day
Ok. Yes. He has a tiny penis. But he also has a trust fund.
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