You are a beautiful, beautiful young lady. Your heart is made of tissue, blood and love. I will call you very soon, Princess Sophia.
sorry i walked in and ruined it, but i had to laugh she looked like a pile of bologna the way you had her pinned up on the wall
i was just texting to let you know that my facebook chat is working again so you can talk to me more. please talk to me more.
you are the best fuck buddy i could have, all the others get feelings and morals involved
My mom made me write an apology letter to all my family for hijacking the eggnog.
We need to be on the same page regarding the 3some this time. No more "one of us should probably leave" moments.
Dude she said she'd let me snort a line off her ass now I just have to wait for them to break up
Whoa, I am aware of WAY too many squirrels right now...
Woke up this morning with a darth vader helmet and a bath robe on with my toenails shitly painted
We tried to do sophisticated last night, but our low class kept shining through.
Alright if I email the police department asking for my mug shot do you think they will email it to me
Just masturbating and watching Sports Center...is this what it's like to be a guy?!
My face feels like a midget just gave birth to quintuplets
I am drunk and aggressive about the olympixs
It's spelled Olympics
He held my hair while I gave him a blow job. Now that's teamwork.
Randomize
