and then he tried plucking my nose hairs. lines were crossed.
There's always the 'not have sex with the drunk girl I just met at some party' option.
That was the plan but Tequila showed up at the party too.
yeah, i'm not. but i'm ready for free bjs. it's just hard to find women who will give me a beej while i'm sobbing uncontrollably
I've decided he is effectively a mouth, hands and cock held together by bad ideas and compliments, and I'm OK with that.
Ended up getting hot boxed in a limo with a bunch of asians going to a karaoke bar. I think I pretended to understand their language for a solid hour. Am I bilingual now?
I mean I sucked his dick at 3 AM... UNDERWATER. I think I have earned a follow back on twitter.
WHY IS FOOD SO DELICIOUS
BECAUSE SCIENCE
You know you are 86'd from the legacy right? You can't down shots then spike the shot glass
When I said to give it to me hard and fast, I didn't mean like 15 seconds fast.
I guess "Ass Fun Friday" is not a thing no matter how many times I say it or bring it up in conversation...
sweating bourbon at client mtg -- you?
In other news, I had my first sex related injury of the school year so that's cool
I told her I was going to masterbate myself into a coma... We have another date on Thursday.
I gotta stop fucking the bouncers. We are running out of bars to go to.
I woke up with my converse still on and a plate of pasta next to my face, if that gives you any indication of how my night went
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