Gettin pulled over, can you watch my dog and pay the bils for a while?
Dude. I haven't taken a shit in a week.
Try anal, it works wonders.
Good thing you left when you did - ended up getting banned from jimmy johns.
margarita wednesday is really going to dip into new year's eve thursday
Best. Four. Twenty. Ever.
well, it ended with me crying outside the strip club saying i don't want to be 21 anymoree. i'd say it was a great 21st birthday.
my co-worker, his best friend who also works with us, an my baby daddy, ive turned love triangle into a retarded shape with to many sides to pronounce
Go ahead. I tried to back up ur budhism story but she mite be catching on
Dammit. I hoped that would work. Just tell her I'm doing my pilgrmidge to Nepal or something.
I honestly didn't see the problem playing beer pong In the car on the road trip home.
Fell asleep in the library, woke up because I almost let out a sleep fart. That was close.
I'm sure if Robin Williams was still with us he would want you to see boobs.
There are condoms rolled onto each bunny ear of the ears I was wearing last night
I didn't even respond. Just letting the crazy settle before I calmly fuck his shit up.
So now I'm just going to brush my teeth, get high, and go to sleep. Like an adult
how do do this?
do what? Keep standing? Choose between 2 guys?
keep making boys cry?
Randomize
