Holy wow, I found all the old poems u wrote me back when we were in looooooooove...just sort of wild to look back on, thought u'd like that
What do you want? Don't say anything that would make me look like a pussy at the store.
so just incase you wake up on the couch wondering how you got there--you came home at 7am, put ice in a cup--then you proceeded to put the cup in the microwave and melt it because you "wanted water". you then, fell down the stairs while saying "you don't know me" then crawled to the couch.
i was mowing the lawn and found the coffee pot in the bushes
one of the cashiers from Kroger is eating at my kitchen table and nobody knows why.
I haven't shaved in at least a week, he said "obviously neither one of us was prepared for this"
WHATEVER CLASS IS PLAYING "TOOT IT AND BOOT IT" AT 8:30 IN THE MORNING, I WANT IN.
I have six drafts of messages to you that just say "blood" and I have no idea where they came from.
You sat on my knee, like Santa, while I peed.
Honestly the war on drugs is dumb and you can just sleep in my bed which is mega comfortable anytime you want. There I said it
Did he seem like the type of guy that would maybe take weed as payment?
She posted a pic of her bf on ig wishing him a happy bday at midnight. She then proceeded to have sex with me. Who is the bday boy again?
I slid a quarter down a drunk man's butt crack last night. Qdoba gets rowdy
Don't tell me you're on acid again
The fact he has had a girlfriend for 5 years and they are trying to work it out isn’t going to stop me from sleeping with him. He said it himself you can’t cheat on someone you love...
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