i just saw a guy carrying a medieval times commemerative glass filled with vomit.. there were 2 people cheering him from behind
I'm starting therapy this week.. Taylor Swift music isn't cutting it for me anymore
we're doing beer bongs from the windmill...epic
there was some random girl that nobody really knew, standing in the corner trying to shave her armpits with a plastic butter knife.
The last thing I remembered was laying in the bathtub fully clothed with the shower running while he was picking grilled cheese out of my hair. I couldn't figure out if i was more upset about being soaking wet or the fact that my grilled cheese was in my hair instead of my mouth.
Just shook hands with the bud light truck driver, thanked him for his service to our country
I should not be in class today. For the professors sake.
U can find me on my couch hungover eatin tuna evaluating my life
Btw: some husbands are not impressed by me trying to snap photos of their wives camel toe.
I just want to let you know how hung over I am today and I fucked a girl in a kangaroo costume last night.
we were playing waterfall, then strip waterfall, then we were just listening to music, drinking, and slowly becoming more naked
It's a "party harder or raise your standards" kind if night.
ya I had reallllllly good sex last night too that will probably get me evicted
Hey I need you to run the morning meeting, for reasons I can explain when I find out where I left my car
I cant promise hot guys but i can promise alcohol which is close enough.
Randomize
