I wanna go to beed woth a nboy
Sometimes I stick my finger in my own ass and pretend it’s a vagina. I think it’s kinda weird. What do you think?
but i have a bet that her boyfriend is going to try and deflower her tonight so i better get a move on if i want to videotape it
Sometimes i look at the biltmore estate and wonder just how small George Vanderbilt's penis was...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You'll be proud of me
Who did you not have sex with
Damn it...you know me too well
You were peeing on yourself thinking it was the sprinkler in your yard
hey quick question, what would you consider to be a "first date" porn?
He scored a 8.5/10 on that girls powerpoint. Of course I slept with him
You went around chanting "dinosaur period" and drinking tomato soup from the can.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Somewhere in the night I send my Dad a text stating "YOU failed as a parent"
Not saying puking on the side of a cab was how I imagined freshman year of med school but...
Please let me buy the coffee, all my assets are in starbucks gift cards
You just put lesbians and Hogwarts in the same sentence. Of course I'm in.
Have you ever drank bourbon in your underwear while wearing a Santa hat and reflecting on the decisions of your life? Asking for a friend.
I am now banned from the bar... Because you got head from my ex in the woman's restroom
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