I got it! After our exam we take shots for every question we skipped!!!
I don't wanna die...
drunk making out is the fucking beeeest. specially when it's your exboyfriend
I wonder if you'll be as excited about this as you are now tomorrow morning.
I don't know who he was, where he came from, or where he went, but he just handed me a bowl of mac and cheese and left. It was good too.
You can come over, sure. But I'll be watching college hockey during the blow job.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
could you please tell me why you thought vodka soaked band aids were a good idea?
Where would I incorporate "your boyfriend fucked the shit out of me last night" before or after Merry Christmas bitch?
I've been smelling a baby wipe for three minutes. I didn't think I was that drunk but I guess I am
it's not like this is the first time she's brought a guy home and I'm the one who hooks up with him
Congratulations, I drank so much for your birthday that I'm shitting blood.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
well apparently i was just calling everyone cunts. then i awoke from my blackout to 3 very mad roommates who didn't bring a key out with them
Is "I am going to murder you if you keep sending me requests that I cannot fulfill" unprofesh?
I have no idea how but i got a hold of a blue food dye packet. And proceeded to rub it all over my tits. So yeah i'd say its safe to say i'll be known as smurfette for a while
He started french braiding my hair while I was blowing him. The question is not why, but how.
I told her I was going to sleep early last night. I probably should not have sent that snapchat of us playing beer pong.
We could probably bang our way to enlightenment. However acid helps.
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