She had a bottle of NAIR in her bathroom, but she clearly hadn't been using it.
at first I thought it was funny, but looking at it now, it screams "dramatic" and "medicated wipes."
grab my backpack.....its in the fridge
I'm sad your dog died... Her name is my stripper name.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I couldnt give him head when all I could hear was his little brother playing the piano and this family singing along to it.
We got the idea to smoke under his bed because, and I quote, "it'd be just like going camping"
Then you jumped in the pool because your were convinced the scratches on your neck from the cat were gills and you could breathe underwater.
Plus, I've always wanted to drive in rush hour with a huge cock drawn on my hood
Just got high and apologized to my vagina for getting chlamydia
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude...are you really going to start sexting during our friend's memorial service?
So I think I've successful blown my foot off in a way that's going to make you call me an idiot.
If I don't answer right away it's because I took an Adderall and the fridge needs cleaned.
dude pick up your phone
i cant. im high and theres a wild turkey in my backyard. wouldnt miss this moment for anything
i feel like i got punched in the face....
you did....
If you can wrestle my underwear off of me, you can top. It'll be like using an amulet in Legends of the Hidden Temple. Instead of not getting captured, you don't get fucked in the ass.
Randomize