I just got a ticket for shitting on a sand dune.
She woke up 3 seperate times, each time she had a look of pure terror on her face, she had no clue where she was.
I can't remember much about walking home last night. I think I kicked a dog.
I could end up kidnapped. Or worse, the night will be really awkward.
Let's play a little game of "Last Night Never Happened"
What do you mean how did you end up there? You told him he had a face you'd like to ride, that's a deal sealer in any language.
Gin and redbull in a wine glass. They think I'm keeping my wits with a really yellow Chardonnay. Gonna get ugly after a couple.
thank god we only have to drink eggnog and rum once a year. It taste like shit.
I met her at the quidditch match. She was the snitch and I caught her. After at the bar she walked up grabbed my hand and said snitches have flesh memories.
Dude you chased a girl around the yard and then fell over the curb. Face first. You got up on your own tho so you reached champion status
Woke up on the couch with one cowboy boot on and a hat over my crotch. God bless texas.
I like how you were offering me $50 last night to come home with you to take care of you and your dog
Also, you fell asleep with you hand on and around my cock last night.
Sex was followed by homemade breadsticks. I waited till after the breadsticks were gone to tell her i had a gf.
fuck st louis. fuck their hockey. fuck their basball. fuck their football if they still got it. fuck their tiddlywinks teamm. fuck their ribs. fuck their entire city. what im trying to say is i dont like st louis
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