Please tell me its not ok to love a 17 year old....no matter how hot he is and how sexy his eyebrow ring is oh lord
We just took the batteries out of the fire alarm to play the breathalyzer game. I love college.
These hangoverless Sunday mornings are becoming too regular.
That's right. If she can't abide by the rules then she gets booted. It's like survivor booty call edition
no one is here. wer drinking in the beer garden in the dark and we stole a bucket of blue paint off the sidewalk. now her legs are blue.
Found your dick twin last night
If I interpreted our horoscopes correctly...you should be coming home with an 8 ball. Just saying.
He got punched in the face, dropped his laptop down a flight of stairs, and broke his roommate's lava lamp, getting all the toxic lava goo everywhere. This is why we don't let him get drunk. And yet here we are.
Fuck my life, there's a fry in my vagina.
It's my vagina- remember its magical and yes I just did mini spirit fingers
I don't think I even want to know why you are sending my husband pictures of your nutsack.
Was asked out on a date tonight on Linked In. That creepy genius at apple that touched my butt one time in the back stairwell. I thinks it's fair to say I've hit rock bottom.
i'm gonna crowd surf you onto his dick
The taste of regret at 8am, yup that taste is Jack Daniel's
I'm sober now, I ate a whole cantaloupe.
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