Hey when I die alone will you come by often enough so that my cats don’t eat my face?
Maury Povich's contact info is in our database at work...i should steal it right?
I figured he was gay when I walked in on him working out to Flirty Girl Fitness.
Life's too short to consider the larger psychological underpinnings of my lust.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We went into lab today and when no one was looking i touched our cadaver's penis!
thanks. im glad you find me better in your comparison between me and fat girl porn.
Oh god he's like Julia Roberts in pretty woman... And I'm the one who's gotta make a lady out of him.
At the drs she looked at my back saw your scratch marks and asked "does your back itch a lot?"
I'm just gonna yell "SURPRISE ME" and see what happens. No way this could go wrong
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This question may sound intrusive, but how did pushing out a baby affect your vagina?
Jesus I should have learned from my first marriage not to get married again
You're not married and none of these idiots are committing to you so whore it up on whore island
Can we go to pirate hooker whore island then
If everything else in my life fails, at least I just had one of my top orgasms
You guys are like the reason that ketamine is a controlled substance.
I feel like any time there's that much rope, lingerie, and horse masks on the ground, it's safe to say it was a great night
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