I think I just saw the travelocity gnome in leather chaps.
I made out with a deaf person. Also I've been drunk 11 days in a row now.
I thought he was joking about the hundred beer challenge until two guys showed up with a camera and boom mic. This cabin party is going to be fucked
Sometimes you gotta take the crosseyed stripper. fuck it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
His words said "save me", but his penis said "I'll take my chances"
I have mastered the 3 minute room cleaning drill in preparation for the nights possible slam-piece
I just want every freshman guy to know about Grindr just so I can have more options
I have an interview tomorrow and listed you as a reference. If they call you, please don't tell them about the time I smuggled a Chalupa out of Taco Bell in my underwear.
I don't give a fuck that he's gay and keeps hitting on me. Free cocaine is free cocaine bro
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He yelled "I'm Bruce Springsteen!" when he came. This is why I don't sleep with guys from Jersey.
Just got hit on by a 28-year old, quadraplegic, triple-cancer-survivor redneck. Now updating bucket list to meet newfound standards.
God I need to hump something, right now.
I got so drunk last night that I was drunk in my dream. Good night
I just realized u compared me to a coconut
I would like you to know, a bag of cheese cubes just attacked me at work.
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