I need to shower the guilt off of my thighs.
Plan A DEFINITELY worked... Go with me to get Plan B??
The line was so long at Kum n Go some guy opened & drank 2 beers from his 12 pack while waiting.
Gave out candy dressed as a porn star...bet you can guess how the mothers kept reacting.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i'm at the st pattys day thing. the bar is packed. they just put on celine dion its all coming back to me now. i'm screaming the words.
it's 1 pm.
there is no amount of schooling that prepares you for when your morbidly obese 45 year old patient tells you she has her clit pierced.
Dude she pregamed for her sorority's philanthropy.
I am significantly less than sober now. Gonna make like, ten hotdogs.
I hate him. I fucked every one of his friends AND his fat brother and he still won't break up with me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You better be making out with him cause we're sitting here with this awkward british girl watching videos of goats singing maroon five
We found you facedown on his couch in a pile of cheerios, with only one shoe on. Dude you said you were staying in last night.
he stopped talking to me, quit his job, moved out of the province and then told me it was "no big" when I called him apologizing...
we both turned hook ups into relationships we are crushing this thing called life right now.
Are you going to eat tacos off the floor again?
I woke up this morning and I had the absolutely horrific realisation that I am the human incarnation of scrappy doo
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