This boy just came into class wearing sperrys and a polo but also carrying a longboard. I'm unequivocably attracted to his level of doucheyness.
he was shitfaced drunk and couldn't walk but could still recite the top 10 in order from the first season of american idol. impressive
well other than the faint smell of fireworks in the truck you can't really tell the windshield was exploded
Incoming: this is a booty call. To accept, please reply with an appropriate time. To reject, please reply "N" and the information will be filed for future reference.
do you think they make 'sorry for walking in on you drunkenly jacking of to a picture of me' cards?
I experienced pure joy just moments ago when I looked down and saw that I had another pop tart to consume down my mouth hole.
If drawing me a picture of his dick in draw something is flirting then he is doing it wrong.
I'm home alone for the next hour and a half, I expect soup and and a willing attitude to do drugs from one of or both of you girls.....annnnnd go
Best thing she said after I kicked her out "rugby guys have single handedly ruined my faith in men"
The nun costume is coming back hard and it still has glitter and the smell of Vegas on it.
Best. Text. Ever.
Your birthday is now over. Your day in the spotlight has dimmed and now you're as special as everyone else. The world goes back to revolving around me. Good night.
The first thing you did was give us a tour of the house and showed us who was "on-limits" and "off-limits"
I just watched a magician wearing a fedora deep throat a balloon\n
I just woke up with a pair of handcuffs in my pants, can u explain this?
After returning from the hospital with lock-jaw from getting tackle at the game. Some naked chick busted out of his room and hit him with a devastating haymaker to the jaw because he wouldn't have sex
Randomize
