if you force a hooker to have sex with you and dont pay her would it be rape or theft? something to ponder
I wanna do crazy things to you in a tent
fuckk wrong person
.. who was that for? a girlscout?
If Jon and Kate can get divorced...how hard can it be for me?
guy picked up a cops taser, thing shot him in the neck, he went down and pissed himself, cop started laughing and hasnt called an ambulance.
I just threw up while getting a haircut. I'm never trying to accomplish stuff with a hangover again.
Sometimes you just need a break, and sometimes you also need to get stoned on these breaks. I sound like some kind of fucked up mr rogers when I say shit like that.
He gave me a hug and said "He doesn't deserve you, Anna. Your boobs are great, and I'd fuck you anytime. Any. Place." I need a new 'gay' friend.
I'm at his house right now making him pancakes to compensate for YOU not giving him a handjob last night. You're welcome.
i told her i wanted to be the Neil Armstrong of her vagina,
They said you bought the guy a shot and was talking about being Greek and then all of the sudden just puked all in their pitcher of beer and got kicked out of the bar.
I'm kinda surprised he wouldn't be honored to take me back as a fuck buddy.
I'm gonna hop on that dick and ride it into the sunset
I'm out of prison. Wanna start a band?
Sorry I didn't call this morning. Ended up with a decorated war veteran last night who besides finding the enemy, KNEW where the fuck my G spot was. He gets a medal in my book!
The work outs are working. Someone just said my body type was “Tits On A Stick”.
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