between no blow jobs for the rest of his life, or no cheese for the rest of his life, he chose no blowjobs. ive never felt so bad about my bj abilities before
Having him eat chocolate out of you is not as romantic as it sounds. I'm still finding pieces.
but seriously ill do anyone in one of those hats with the earflaps.
He's pole dancing on a heat lamp.
You don't understand how difficult it is to give head with cotton mouth
Hey so summary of last night. I threw up in a rain boot then tipped it over on my bed, did my laundry and passed the fuck out. I feel like I didn't see you.
Ya well my good-girl image was pretty much blown when he found out I'm going to jail soon.
Hahaahaah I keep finding little notes you left me on my physics notes... "TOO HIGH FOR BIRDS"
I even tried crushing up viagra and putting it in his beer... And the next day he found the package on the counter. I told him it was for my friends husband.
I have stickers all over my boobs and a lump the size of china on my forehead. today has not been good.
I achieved maximum drunk last night. It was pretty extreme. Woke up on a couch, outside, in a suit
I would do everything over again, except the fireball.
I couldn't find any flowers so I brought her a cat.
CAPS.LOCK.AND.SPACEBAR.ARE.BROKEN.
Dude. All I know is that I woke up on the floor with two naked chicks who don't speak English.
Clutch
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