apparently 9 shots of absynthe does not take away your skill to walk. i just woke up under a tree in some field on the other side of town with 4 hours missing.
you kept spraying the cat with water and then telling it to "man up" when it cried
I just chased the everclear with Listerine...I think I found my new chaser!
So I'm at planned parenthood and there are 5 people here from Friday's party.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The bride says you won't want any of the single ladies...
Let's let the open bar be the judge of that.
its barely noon and he already threw up and i have second degree burn
He just showed up to brunch with one shoe and only the battery from his phone.
You were outside the bathroom the gay guy was puking in, screaming "IT GETS BETTER!" over and over again. Good message, poor execution.
After the Jell-o shots and about 6 shots of lighter fluid brand tequila, it got to the point where breathing was painful. All I could do was pray I didn't fall asleep in the front yard.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My favorite thing about your netflix account "suggestions for you" section: Russias Toughest Prisons is followed immediately by Strange Sex
if i ever get to the point where i am moaning when i pee, please do the honorable thing and kill me.
A dozen fresh-baked cookies delivered to my dorm AND I don't have chlamydia or gonorrhea... Could this night get any better??
honestly if there were pictures of last night i would be embarrassed.... im embarrassed without pictures
day drinking didnt prepare me for this..
3 hour lecture of my biology teacher talking about isotopes and space shuttles. I'm way too high for this.
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