happy early fathers day!!!
im not a father
about that...
Dude. I tried to convince her to eat poprocks and give me a blowjob. It did not work out well.
ya she's here .. it looks like she just gave up and passed out on the floor
Her brother is definitely not gay. I hooked up with him when she was sleeping.
no dont worry i changed into my costume in the hospital bathroom
I gasped. Both pairs of lips did.
Just saw a drunk bitch in the west village peeing on a car. You are not alone.
Oh god. I asked to "play his sexaphone" which I though was a super sex way to say "let me blow you". He fucking walked home at 4:30am
Any residual attraction has just been ruthlessly murdered by that mustache.
I just had a very enlightening conversation with my hat. we need more of whatever the fuck that was.
I told him that I wanted his dick like I wanted a jumbo hot dog. There something wrong with my priorities
The Olympian is in my bed
How do I word.. " hey, I need you to fuck me really hard and see if you or I can feel my birth control. No worries, this is just an experiment." In a nice way without them feeling used.
Just blew on a shot of whiskey to cool it off, like it was soup...
4 of us. Guys and girls. Were sitting there discussing the passed out half naked Brit girl on the floor. She is no longer the international woman of mystery.
Randomize
