it's my fault, I passed out instead of getting up to pee.
he said i was weird because i want to have sex in public places.
i dont think thats weird i think thats fun
i forgot to tell you, he fell asleep outside my house again last night, but im weird
just watched an entire episode so you think you can dance for head. so wasn't worth it
and im sitting here waiting for them to work on my car. in a room full of men. that are too old for me. its like a sausage fest nightmare...
She wants out first dance to be to 98 degrees i do cherish you...remember how i said we didn't need open bar....
about to tell this girl that sh'es my teenage dream. you have 15.358s to stop me.
Was just explained ingredients in a four loko. Puzzles of the universe starting to piece together.
yeah, I said "hi, I'm the creepy old guy at the college bar" and she said that she like mature men, wasn't expecting that line to work
it's all fun and games til I text you in last nights clothes with a head bleed
We walked in and someone handed her an unopened bottle of jack with her name on it. She's like a drunken celebrity.
So last night was the first of "I got cut off before I walked in the bar".
You're seeing with your vagina, not your eyes.
He started yelling "you tha man!" while I was reverse cowgirl
Fuck you. You were a total asshole last night.
We will get to that, but can anybody tell me whose fucking socks I am wearing?!
We have ur drink. Mom passed out in the bathroom. I'm goin to the other bathroom. Bs at the top of the stairs on way outside.
Randomize
