It was just so hard to get through Conan without crying like a baby. I'm just so proud of him.
I don't know what kind of drugs you were on last night but you kept trying to highlight my face because you said I was important
well tonys high enough to be moving from spot to spot around the kitchen shooting tortellini into a boiling pot and yelling "KING JAMES" whether he makes or misses it.
It took my four years to get this degree, and 4 hours to lose it, My parents are not impressed.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just saw your girl from last night... Be embarrassed
He was at the bottom of the stairs showering himself with the popcorn, then eating a few handfuls and running around.
The liquor store was handing out free shots of some new expensive vodka, but they caught on the fourth time we came back in different outfits. Politics.
I succsesfully kept my nipples in my dress all night. Even when I got in a fight. I was made for the bar.
Jesus christmas you are like the Martha Stewart of threeway planning
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I faked an orgasm during phone sex last night. This relationship is starting to become real.
I offered to lick your vagina while wearing a suit... Pretty sure chivalry is well alive.
I can't tell if my bong is gender-neutral or not
His dick is so big it could be an arm rest.
I was out of breath when we were getting started and he offered me his inhaler so he's a keeper
Be careful, there is sex in the air.
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