Okay you're seriously so fucking annoying its like having a baby
Should I be offended if he asked if he could use saran wrap to eat me out?
Don't worry I'll hold the wheel while you cum
Please get rnbert tn get chebk h'm in i'm no dead when he getr gome
at that time a 4 pound meatball stuffed with pizza rolls seemed more important than bailing you out of jail.... sorry.
We should tie ourselves together anytime there is any type of alcohol involved. It's the safest way. I either end up with freshmen or weird ex bfs. You end up with a large cowboy. This is not good for us
Picture this: me driving down 183 throwing up into a towel. I just hit rock bottom.
All I know is that either you or I told a black guy that he looked like usher and he was sexy and that is our confession
Woke up naked wearing mismatched earrings. Didn't even make it to the bar.
Dude, nobody just eats a banana these days. This chick wanted it. She wanted to get down with Charlie Brown.
I said that I'm avoiding parties and guys, and the freshman girl just laughed
this could be the second dad I've smoked weed with
Remember the girl I had sex with in the dorm stairwell? She got married!
All I know for sure is, I went to bed drunk and I woke up in a relationship..I think I need to reevaluate my drinking skills.
If the smell of things stopped me from putting things in my mouth. I wouldn't be popular with Grindr guys.
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