we might have left him a semi topless video on his wall. godd i just hope they suspend my accont so i stop doing thses things.....
It was like doing yoga with his dick in me
Adam has been drinking
Who has his phone
Adam does
Just got kicked in the balls by a girl in tap shoes. Fuck EVERYTHING
that would combine my 3 fave things. christmas funfetti and paul simon
I got groped on the dancefloor by both grooms. I love gay weddings
rolled over to window for cup of snow instead of leaving bed for water. that's how hungover
I need to stop smoking. I just talked to corn.
Just blew my age on the breathalyzer. I also have 8 stitches in my head. So worth a .22 though. All time record.
On a lighter note, my mom and I were playing scattergories, and for "things that you keep hidden" we both put dildo. Proof that we really are related.
I was at a bus stop, eating a load of bread. Fairly sure I'm the poster child for poor students.
its not like i called off work either time for the purpose of tripping, it was more like well, i have nothing to do now today, there is acid and im only human.. but twice
Your trash is full of condoms and yoohoos what a great life we live
You know you have an interesting job when you go to work and have to Google search "How to get poop out of a dryer".
Nice girl until she takes off the fake human suit and shows you the flesh eating demon she truly is
Randomize
