Drunk x Brooklyn = problems getting home. If I don't make it you can have my computer and my bitches. You're welcome.
Is it wierd that you're going to be my best man and you've fucked my wife?
Found crayons in my cigarette pack. I can't help but feel you may be responcible.
Yeah like 200 white people came and they are playing that one Biggie Smalls song everyone knows.
These days, you and me are swimming in dicks.
Marco
Polo
Im going in through the window and borrowing her dog. Dont worry ive done this before. we have an agreement.
i wasnt laughing because you were puking, i was laughing because three yards away there was a couple seriously getting it on
continuing my moment killer tradition in the best possible way
ok. i'm ready for you to come back and test the structural integrity of this futon.
Ok, they now been on the roof for two days. I can see 4 cases of teecate and a carton of smokes. They are yelling at "fucking fall" and pissing off the roof.
Landen experienced Greenville for the first time last night. He was awaken by 2 cops and 4 EMS guys this morning in the bed of that truck that is for sale at the swashbuckler carwash, said he was trying to walk to waffle house... Greenville- 1, Landen- 0
you ran up to the police and said "fuck the police shit we living in hell ". Then you dropped your Margarita and said "Darby Out" lol
I just had to break into my old house and steal my sex tape. Good times. How have you been?
You're a mystery wrapped in an enigma wrapped in a redhead
You kept pointing at me and saying I'm getting chicken parmesan and no one is going to stop me
Why the fuck are you playing with legos?
Why the fuck are you questioning me?
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