On friday while at the hotel bar by myself (creepy) I made friends w/ a millionaire who said he may be running for the position of mayor in richmond va (likely a lie). At one point during our discourse he asked if I was crazy. In the effort of full disclosure I looked him in the eye and said yes
I don't know what prompted his inquiry, clearly this man had impeccable intuition
Would you object to my putting the bidet video on my Facebook page? It;s awesome.
Sex on bubble wrap = best decision ever.
I just saw a commercial for "tickle me elmo hands" and I am almost 100 percent sure that at the end elmo said "yeaaaaa boooyyyyyy"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I would give my right arm to go back to college. Or maybe not. Would be kinda hard to pick up guys with one arm. Then again, knowin what I do now...I could take any freshman bithc with only one arm.
Found the puke drawer
To tired for the bar. Came home and drank wine out of the bottle. Kind of don't want to know what that says about my life.
High Amy loves you. Sober Amy is unsure, but she's not here so fuck that bitch.
He's in the hospital yelling at his brother to at least have stuck something "normal" up his ass.
Again?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's that time of night again when I start to think I'm really funny, but no one else is as drunk as I am so they all start avoiding me.
I'm drunk and I have your birth certificate
This is ridiculous. I’m in fucking college getting high off a potato.
Having weed delivered to your door is like having your own personal Santa Claus
This is worse than naked and afraid. This is drunk and confused.
i am also 80% sure that my shirt glows in the dark.
Randomize