I want to snug with you.
You want my snuggie?
I'll collect that couch/porn sloopy beedge tomorrow just FYI
did you make any bad decisions?
many, i pretty much fell in love with a freshman...it doesn't get much better than that
My drunk dialing habit needs to go. My drunk habit can stay though.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's like sleeping with someone you met at a karaoke bar. It's never okay.
do you remember the random banging on my door at 3 am wearing 2 budlight cases as a dress
Also I stopped in the middle of the road and put my hazards on because BUNNIES WERE PLAYING
He's doing his thing where I don't know if he's alive until three in the afternoon so idk
If I die tonight, I want you to have the rest of my nachos. And my porn collection.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude. My tinder just blew up in Seattle. I'm moving here. I don't give a fuck
If its not for food we ain't going out.
This is why you arnt allowed in pet stores
bonging vodka is the same level of "good idea" as eating machetes
He's a douche. But I like the way he chokes me.
You tried to run away last night. The neighbors brought you back.you were in their hot tub again. This needs to stop
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