What do they do with the elephants that die at the zoo
Cremation, why do you ask?
I think we have a bit of a problem
yeah, and then after the convo was clearly over, my dad decides to scream "SIZE MATTERS" just to make things even more uncomfortable.
I just can't bring boyfriends home.
this ms. usa coverage has sucessfully humbled every girl here. depressed fish in a leaky barrel. go!
Hefty paycheck and not get wasted can't exist in the same night
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Eating my shrimp pasta on the porch with a 40, wearing a Hawaiian shirt, proclaiming "I GOT SCRIMPS." I just jumped the shark of college.
Is there a special protocol when the stripper has a Boba Fett tattoo?
By 11 pm the pants were off and there was no turning back. But on the bright side, you promised me your CDs when you died, you even signed a napkin saying so.
She makes him look at her naked pics before she sends them to someone she's actually going to fuck. I think this makes him mayor of the friend zone.
I really thought I'd be the only alcoholic drinking alone in my car at noon in the Lowe's parking lot. Passed out dude in the car next to me begs to differ.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Step 1: chug a red bull vodka with no ice Step 2: chase that with a shot of wild turkey Step 3: chase that with a shot of tequila
Step 4: your drunk
I faked more orgasms with him then ever should be allowed for someone this pretty.
tinder day one and i already had more guys message me about "the girl with the big tits in my second picture" than about me. MY 17 YEAR OLD SISTER CAN GET LAID WITHOUT EVEN HAVING TO MAKING A PROFILE
to be fair she does have a great rack
I'm definitely single now but she stole my mailbox
NO ITS THAT IM A SEXUAL DEVIANT AND CANT FILTER MYSELF
If I end up in the hospital remind me to order jimmy johns.
Why?
They deliver.
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