I just love slightly exposed cleavage. Not too much to be whory but just enough to say "your kids will never go hungry"
We played Russian Roulette with a revolving Nerf gun. If you shot yourself in the face, you had to drink.
making a list of all the places we've peed. separate list of places we peed when we were stoned
We're 17 hours into a 3 day weekend, and he's already shitfaced. He fell of the dock TWICE and insisted on wearing a life jacket on dry land.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I can't even remember the last time I took my own pants off
I think I want to impress his gay best friend more than him..
You'd be proud! I didn't lose my id this time... It got confiscated
She ran over a curb, took out a yard-sale sign and hit a fence before admitting to me that she may be losing her vision "a bit". Never letting grandma drive again.
My mom just covered me while I peed in the street. I love her. i also love parents weekend.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I love being high. The owl outside stopped who-ing and I could swear I just heard someone say, "Okay, that's a wrap!"
I just had sex with the male version of myself. looks, mindset, even our boob to dick ratio was the same
When God made him he put all his talent in his dick. What he lacks in brain, he makes up for in loin.
That awkward moment when you hear your boss yelling during sex while you're on her couch eating Easy Mac.
No no. Thank you. Killed multiple birds with one penis.
No. I'm home alone and 100% dickless. I hate my life.
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