Boner jamz table deep. plus bar deep. wiing waing.
Today's life lesson: fat girls should not wear tight miniskirts and vinyl leggings. This Forever 21 salesgirl is a hot mess.
On blowjobs: "If you decide to go there, you finish the job. No complaining." I don't care if it sounds like she's talking about Iraq, I'm in love.
I think she kind of thinks she's better than us now ... please. I go to Michigan.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My professor just suggested making the state of the union more interesting by turning it into a drinking game. Brilliant!!
she said she'd get any tattoo I wanted ... so she's getting a large crossword puzzle as a tramp stamp. I'm the Einstein of doggy style
well you haven't lived until you've been 86'ed from a family restaraunt
We'll cross that bridge when we come to it... Or burn it. Either way we'll deal with it later
I want a meaningful relationship and i wont get one if i keep giving him blow jobs in my basement while watching family guy.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
After we fucked he shhhh'd me and said your welcome
I just finished spraying the foam party off my pumps with a garden hose
I couldn't tell if they ere dancing or fucking but they won the costume contest
Just found a condom on my floor from last weekend. 2/2. The scavenger hunt is over.
I guess when I black out I feel that it's not inappropriate to grope my gf in front of her parents.... But hey at least I'm starting off 2013 single
She was talking about how a garden gnome was hitting on her the whole night. We thought she was just that high, but turned out the gnome was that guy in the weird hat.
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