Go to google and type XXX
.......Is that how you look for porn?
i love my job...i have craft hour at my desk w twizzlers
can u grab me a application
waiting in line for my ID. the kid in front of me reaks of hopes and dreams and hornyness-- freshmen by calvin klein
I lost control in the snow and hit a parked car. I went into our building to get a pen and paper to leave a note and when I came back the car was gone and there was a hot girl there. I used the pen and paper to get her number.
airport. 106 proof japanese liquor. 4 little travel size containers. im proud to be smarter than the average american.
So he thinks I sent him a picture of my boob last night, but it was really just a close up of my arm.
Time flies when you're blacked out in a lake
I have a friend that keeps saying he wants to go bear hunting. Thought I would say just walk down church street at night. What intersection is it?
Totally forgot I asked the cop for a theoretical fist bump and he still let me drive away
I accidentally kneed him in the balls while trying to straddle him so we ended up spending the night watching ffm porn online
I have found random beers stashed in my purse and microwave... Apparently I thought 2015 was gonna have a beer shortage
He called yelling about whhhhhhiskey and enchiladas I heard sirens in the background last time I talked to him b
I blasted the Halloween Before Christmas soundtrack last night so my roommate wouldn't hear me having sex. Needless to say the sex got a little weird.
And I woke up by myself with peanut butter.. Cool
My vagina measures dicks. It's accurate to the half inch.
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