You bet me 100 dollars that the Raiders would win the super bowl this year. I have it on tape.
I Just paid off the bartender to help me convince this chic my roommate's gay. This is the best cockblock ever.
while we were making out your friend starting kissing my toes and all you had to say was "just go with it"
It was kind of like a train wreck, except alcohol would have improved the situation greatly.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
U owe me five dollars for that paper towel you bet i wouldnt eat last night
Moral of the story: If you're gonna throw a glass of wine in a guy's face, don't do it in your own kitchen.
We now know how the night ended in arrest according to the flip camera I did 10 handle pulls and beer bonged a 40. My life choices are getting worse and worse this is your fault.
Shouldn't have fucked on the top bunk, I bounced so high my hair got caught in the ceiling fan and almost broke my neck.
He threw up on my head while I was blowing him, and then I started barfing, and the kitchen floor was a mess. Believe me, he will never, ever live this down.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think the lady at jack in the box started crying when we put in our order.
Owwww. A manager/ employee sex scandal that DOES NOT involve me! SCORE!!!
Not gonna lie: had to look up how to spell fellatio. Not sure I spelled it right even now. Looks like a Shakespearean character. ENTER FELLATIO, SOLILOQUIZING.
Oh my god. We just got locked out of our cabin and went to the neighbor's to see if they had a key and caught the neighbor jerking it. My night > your night
It's alright. I'm just trying to make her realize you're not good enough for her.
So I figured out why that guy from Tinder stopped messaging me back. He got married.
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