windsor, ontario is like a poor man's amsterdam
no, it is just poor
ive decided something. ive accepted you as being gay. but i havent accepted you as a vegetarian yet.
He brought a jar of pickles to the party. So now I've had beer, animal crackers, AND a pickle since noon.
We forgot to go back and get the brick YOU WANTED TO BRING INTO THE BAR?
I deserve like a purple heart or something. I just made it all the way drunk through my 2 story house without making a sound. While carrying a trombone.
Lets ignore the fact that you want to turn your dorm room into a sex dungeon and focus on the real issues here.
It's a strange mix of shame and pride every time I pee at the bar and still see my lipstick on the bathroom wall...
I can't ever date him again. Whenever I see his face I just remember helplessly pissing myself in my car.
I had 17 beers 2 days ago. I'm not dad material yet
Sitting in my car feasting on the spoils of Taco Bell as Donna Lewis croons "I love you, always forever." A more perfect moment will never exist.
Let me know. Show me one boob if yes. 2 if no
He had Homeward Bound on VHS how was I supposed to not fuck him
It took me an hour to walk from my drive way to my front door... what the fuck was in that weed?
I drank all the wines... and all th Doritos. Whilst watching Fat Camp. I need to reassess my values.
He slept outside in his hammock, and then took a lawn chair with him in the shower because he was too drunk to stand up.
Randomize
