oh btw spread eagle is not an appropriate phrase to use in a scientific presentation. learned that the hard way
he suggested we appoligize to eachother. then do blow and painkillers & have ourselves a make-up party.
in case you havent found it already in honor of Toy story 3 we wrote ANDY on the bottom of your foot while you were passed out on the couch.
Just made everyone at my party download the vuvuzela app for iPhone, the neighbors absolutely HATE us
i don't really know how much tequila is too much
does it still count as break up sex if it's 4 months later? sorry i'm just looking for an excuse to fuck him.
You love him. Dinosaurs. Math. Sex.
I'm buying drugs in the library...And it's not even finals time. What has my life become?
The next time you try to involve a tickle me Elmo in my orgasm, I'm leaving you
Lucas & I had a photo shoot with her cape & I had child arm floaties on most the night.. woke up in a spiderman bed
He expects to fuck my tits but will ignore me in public.
I told her I was dressed as a gag reflex judge.....she won, literally hands down.
I thought the Bane mask would really repel dudes but instead I ended up grinding on a frat dude that whispered "bad bitch contest, you in first place" in my ear in a Batman voice
Do they sell "congrats in losing your virginity!" cards and do they come in gay?
hey im sorry i made fun of the color of your sheets, but like it was all i could focus on during sex because they were just THAT UGLY
Randomize
