if i'm ever as drunk as the girl in front of me... kill me.
ya know if you hadnt broke up with me, that porno we made wouldnt have a 3.3 rating on youporn right now...
At the hair cuttery. A father here with his daughter just answered his phone "ken's whorehouse"...Now I remember why I used to pay more for haircuts.
i had a dream that i had so much marijuana that i didn't know what to do with it. i woke up and cried.
my grandma was just praying before dinner, and before she could finish my gpa lifted his glass and said 'and here's to avatar!'
That's ok. I found a crab leg in my bed and have no pants on.
i swear to god even though i took those meds before coming here i did not hallucinate zulema silently throwing up into a breakfast burrito
i just added no after every hockey player in my phone..
i think this is the gayest thing you've ever shown me. and i'm pretty sure you've sent me pictures of a dude sticking his dick in a horse's nose.
i admit it was a weird experience, but why regret what once made you cum
He was trying to hotbox the banana suit. Of course we traded him for vodka.
but im not going to tell the owner of the penis of my dreams how to wear his hair.
I am seriously only coming over if there are McNuggets. I want 10 bitch. Honey mustard.
I woke up wearing nothing but my red thigh high socks and a blue wig. I have no idea what happened.
I don't want to be flamboyant (says the guy who bought a hot pink suit to be a flamingo for Halloween)--but I don't mind being a little extra.
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