All drunkenness aside, confirm u are alive
it felt great physically, but AWFUL morally.
he called me a worthless slut and then went 2 the bathroom 2 pee on the floor before leavin. but he was really hot and he left his jacket, should i call him?
Balls are like the throw pillows of the penis
After last night's events, I googled "how to change your life direction." I found a really helpful ehow.com article.
Well, I fucked her. But the sex wasn't all that great. Morning sex never is
So he ended up throwing a watermelon that he stole from the cafeteria saying "if i cant have it no one can" of the 5th floor.
He's the second guy this morning whose job is jeopardized because of my vagina.
so gross sitting on a warm chair at a restaurant..you just know a fat person was sitting there shoveling food into their face for hours.
I drunkenly called my ex on Skype last night and didn't talk, just smiled real big at him until I fell asleep.
When the cab driver starts laughing its a good indication of the standard of girls you are bringing home
Do you know how much wine is in a box of wine? Not so much an amount, but whether it will kill me if I drink the entire box this xmas
Had an orgasm and got a charley horse at the same time. It was a multi-purpose scream.
He brought me another shot of rum, ice and my underwear when I woke up.
What a gentleman.
I KNOW, right?!
I looked into her soul, didn't I?
You eye-fucked her soul.
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