Your date looks like the Cloverfield monster. good luck.
Was just hit on by a guy with 2 kids and one was named Rocky. I need to get out of Buena Park.
A very small part of me wants you to appreciate me for more than just my breasts. But the rest of me is breasts.
Found a dirty envelope on my seat w ur name and $122.50 written on the front. Nothing inside but what looks like dirty pine needles
Dude. It just hit me for a second time. My thumbs are huge and moving very quickly. Like stampeding buffalo...
I did nothing besides stay sober all night, I walked home to find max naked knocking cups off the counter with his cock lol
Next sat night Titanic party. Bring your floaties, trashy necklaces, and a large lung capacity. This ship is going downnnnnnn.
The cop told you to put your hands behind your back and you slurred "I'm not falling for that again"
I'll be gone when you wake up but you hit a girl so I knocked you out. Never hit a girl. Unless it's with your penis.
All I know is I got on a table at late night and sang gotta go my own way
I'm just saying, I walked in on you blowing a burrito. I now understand how obsessed you are with Taco Bell. And how long it's been since you've got some.
After sex he brought chocolates and said he loves RuPaul's Drag Race. How many points does he score for that?
and please, if you feel the urge to call me crying tomorrow night, do so. i will be home bored and sober.
Your dad was just slow dancing with the priest and holding a beer. Classic
Of course his mom thinks you're nice, she doesn't know you have sex for cheeseburgers
One time!! I like sex and food....
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