I need to talk to you about an important matter involving lesbians.
I'm pretty sure he came before I knew he was inside me.. Didn't think that was his plan when he said he was gonna do things I've never experienced before
the day after is always just damage control
I woke up with a picture of my dick as my background. still wondering if it was a good night or not.
I think I could pass a breathalyzer. But with like a C.
every time i recognize a doctor or patient at the hospital on this rotation, i just pray it's not from my blackout saturday makeout slut moments...professionalism shouldn't count on weekends
Its what im here for. Critiquing penis photos.
Definitely just put my car on cruise control so I could stick my head out of the sunroof while driving to taco bell.
He looks like he'd be great Lego character.
How can I explain how nice he is to you? ...like, I'm going to have to have my world famous why being a douche is sexy talk.
Jesus horatio Christ I forgot my mittens and am considering shoving my hands down the pants of the first semi attractive man I see
He started french braiding my hair while I was blowing him. The question is not why, but how.
Sigh. I'll find the right guy one day.
Prince charming is right around the corner and will be freaky as shit!
Imma make him fuck me with my jersey on tonight while I chant Go Jets Go. Gotta love playoff hockey szn.
I’ve got full Covid immunity, blonde hair and great tits! I’m basically unstoppable
Randomize
