I don't want to have to wonder if I'm draining my pasta in the same side of the sink you pissed in
finding my wedding ring encrusted in vomit this morning really just topped off last night...
Of course, I believed he would find me irrestible...sloppy drunk, chugging from a bottle of chardonnay, and completely naked because those kids stole my clothes as I was swimming on their private beach
She woke up with blood running down her face and asked the EMS guy where the keg was
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Seriously. He was just sitting there naked in the dark with a boner pissed that I came home late.
I left my Thanksgiving family dinner puking in my hands from the worst hangover in the world
She looked at my facebook and decided to bump the security deposit up an extra 250...now we have to destroy the house, its expected and I wouldn't want to disappoint
I think we got naked. I can't remember but if you have "friends" written on your ass, then we did. Because I have "best" on mine.
He held back my hair as I puked, then kindly asked me to slightly move my head over and pissed right next to my face.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Bacardi 151 is like a past nightmare I'm still curious about
I walked in and saw her crying and singing to her dog
wtf guys I thought we agreed on no more knives. So much for not destroying the house
I just met him at a place called the meat farm, Jesus be a shield.
Party bus got out of hand. Some guy pissed himself. Later, he couldn't find his house keys, so he kicked the back door in.
My husband is waiting until son is napping and air humps as a seduction tactic. Pray for me.
Randomize