If it has a penis then it will be stupid. Just how it works.
She had a maple leaf tattoo behind her ear and told me she liked my "playoff beard".
Only in Canada would your laziness be applied to hockey and rewarded.
At the wedding. Seated next to the bar. No way this ends well
I've decided, even as much fun as it sounds, I don't care for his sodomy box.
It's official. I now have that "I was drunk and needed the money" college story to share later in life.
she gave me her number. found out it was already stored in my phone as "bathroom blowjob"
We built a fire and had sex in the kiddie pool. Then he washed my hair
Strong work
Come part with me. By you sleep! No fun. Idek feelings Sorry for your life.
im dying and naked and this is what youre living with next year.
He's only done it missionary. His world is about to be rocked. Do you know what I look like from behind?
He called his dick the "gentle giant"
Someone who makes you cum so hard that you have an asthma attack is clearly your soulmate
He stopped mid-fuck to explain his choice in pillows. HE WAS STILL IN ME!
I was so high I forgot how to swallow food, and I just kept thinking "thank god its just mashed potatoes, they'll go down eventually"
Maybe for you. You don't have to clean the melted butter off the stove. I LOST THE SPECIAL SEASONINGS.
Randomize
