have fun at tinkers! p.s. are there any hot guys who look like they wanna wait until marriage to have sex?
Do you think the new Crest Whitestrips Advance Seal would stay on while I give him head? It would be great to knock out 2 things at once...
my fingers and penis are no longer on speaking terms. My penis is too jealous of where my fingers get to go.
fyi, if youre wondering if offering a female police officer sexual favors will get you out of a ticket, the answer is no.
I woke up with a picture of my dick as my background. still wondering if it was a good night or not.
I made friends with a raccoon. I pet it. Like I was Pocahontas.
Just told my mom sparks is a health drink. Officially getting hammered on the way to the beach.
Just made a jeopardy bj game. Every question has 10-50 seconds on it and if he's right that's how many he gets.
Just found an unopened tied g of coke on the floor in her room... she thinks the maintenance guy dropped it earlier today. This takes the cake for sketchiest apartment.
So I saw her today...and it was weird...she is just like not pregnant anymore.
Dude...how high are you? of course she isnt pregnant anymore...thats what happens when you give birth
HELP! How do I get paint off the dog?
The first thing we did this morning was see if we could see her barf in the prking lot from the roof. We could. It was in 5 spaces.
he was wearing a pyjama shirt under a dress shirt under a hoodie under a robe under a rain poncho the man was prepared for anything
I’m pregaming Christmas shopping with grandma. What’s up?
dude, where did you go? french fries taste like numbers
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