He just refered to Steak and Shake as "a good place for couples". I will definitely not be shacking tonight.
The visine ive been using for four yrs expired. in sept. of 2001.....i will never question my eye problems again.
do you know how scary it is to wake up in a CATSCAN machine after a night of drinking?
I wonder if he just picks random boners to send or just the realy impressive ones
Chick stood right next to me in the elevator. Like she had the whole elevator and she stood right next to me. So I farted.
This is stressing me out. I feel like I need to eat the dick.
I think I'm gonna wear a bikini to our final tomorrow...just so he knows that no fucks will be given on his test
We shot off some fireworks at 12 and then I orchestrated the group singing of god bless the USA all while wearing a don't tread on me flag as a cape. I repped hard.
You me handle of captain and a sorostitute study sesh, if we don't get laid mancards must be relinquished
After the Jell-o shots and about 6 shots of lighter fluid brand tequila, it got to the point where breathing was painful. All I could do was pray I didn't fall asleep in the front yard.
Just got tinder matched with my COMM TA. Game on.
I just farted so loud someone came to check on me. Thought something fell in my office.
I told my manager that I would be coming in to work either high from edibles on purpose or tripping on acid by accident so he knows to check my work tomorrow.
You can’t homewreck what the Lord hath brought together.
i solemnly vow to never stick my penis into crazy again
I give it a week.
Randomize
