Skip Greektown and come to Geektown. I just want to cuddle.
We may have a problem that even dr. phil cant solve
dude sorry but u no that when a guys 'likes' ur pic on facebook it only means he was just jacking off to it.
Sometimes to bang a cougar u gotta play wii With her kids
I love memorial day. It's drinking in the name of patriotism. God Bless America
I told him he was my first gentile. He was so flattered.
Just re-gained consciousness in the freshman girls dorm. Normally this would be awesome but I'm on the floor surrounded by chicks doing their homework. This makes me uncomfortable but I don't think they know I'm awake yet. If I b-line for the door can you come get me?
He's a cat fanatic .. That was not in the fine print when we started fucking
Every single item that was in my fridge is now in my hot tub. Please help
Haha. Last winter I went through this phase where id go to the bars with my own giant goblet and demand to be served white wine and red bull hah
It's called hot rabbit the party if he asks the password is "careful" don't ask
I would rather suck a dick or two than go there
He caught me mid-escape...one leg out the window, bra n thong in hand.I just looked at him and said "Bye Now" n proceeded to fall out his window....then.... tell me why he texted me 30 min later to make sure i got home ok! #igotthis
i’m blowing bubbles in my bloody mary so yeah it’s pretty much time to go
Dude. That's like masturbating until the point that you're going to climax, then stopping, waiting for a few seconds and then starting all over. While that does lead to an altogether more powerful orgasm, it's still annoying as hell until you get there.
I was not expecting that analogy.
No one ever expects that analogy.
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