kill, fuck, marry: alice cullen, hermione granger, ginny weasley.
damn... fuck alice for sure, I feel bad but i think I have to say marry ginny... and kill hermoine! I can't believe I'm answering this right now.
and he thought i came like four times in 2 mins. my leg just kept cramping up
after taking her first shot and having her first random hook up she finally feels like she is ready for college
she has no idea
Just walk-of-shame'd past fifteen little girls at summer camp. Take a good look girls, I am you in twelve years.
Just charged fat mistake $3 for a beer.
He called the drink "The Annexation of Puerto Rico". He wouldn't tell us whats in it but said that we should all fear for our lives. Let's do this.
I'm that hungover student in class ... On a wednesday morning
Omg I think I'm in the wrong class
I'm tired and starving, and I'm pretty sure I just cost the company 33,000 dollars...fuck you and you're "you'll love going to work high" nonsense.
WHEN DO I FOLLOW THESE PEOPLE. I WOKE UP THIS MORNING &FOUND TWEETS FROM ILLUMINATI AND "hot shot 6th grader"
I decided staying home, watching porn and masterbating was a much better choice than the gym. And I was right.
she asked me to come back to her house where "hopefully her kids were asleep". that my friend is what i call a dealbreaker
he has the ass of a greek god and he made me breakfast
ever since I turned 21 the mother-daughter bonding sessions always end with whiskey and my little pony. I don't know why, it's just a thing that happens
YOU CAN'T GET A TATTOO BECAUSE OF KPOP FANFICTION. THAT'S NOT HOW LIFE WORKS
I think I just got drunk texted by my psychiatrist
Randomize
