I'd do that. But we would need storm trooper helmets.
His pick-up line from last night: "I bet you cant climb these stairs right now." Needless to say.. it worked.
I started the year with 2,800 dollars and am now down to 83 dollars-one of which i use to snort my focalin. I have given up on food and am perplexed as to how I can make 82 dollars last more than two weekends for booze
He just went up to bed, still drunk from last night, carrying a pear, a pipe, and an unopened bottle of wine. I think he'll be fine.
Then he told me he was proud of me for remembering that i blew him that night.. Maybe my drinking is getting out of hand.
I Know I'm the drunk girl in the trunk right now, BUT PLEASE LISTEN TO ME!
He slow fucked me. Doggy style. On a porch. You never slow fuck doggy style. Its a law. A LAW.
I cried and ate like 6 tacos in the taco bell parking lot at almost midnight, sober, alone, listening to a demi lavato cd. And that was the good part.
Oh and my new excuse for not being able to hook up is cholera, feel free to use it
Lots of alcohol last night skiing this morning = me throwing up off chairlift
Thank you for making it possible for me to get laid while having peace of mind my dog is well taken care of.
I have too much respect and admiration for my dick to put it into a situation where he could possibly be killed
Yea I saw a friend of yours carrying your limp body somewhere
She said, I've heard about you, from girls you wouldn't even be interested in. What?
Fun fact. I just wrapped myself in wrapping paper for a sext. Is this a new high or a new low stay tuned.
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