There is a distinct lack of front teeth here.
She keeps stunt undies in her bag, 2 sizes too small. She leaves them behind so the guy thinks he was luckier than he was...
After walking in on us in the living room, he still insisted that he slept in my bed with me afterwards.
Well now I have my semen on her headphones
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You walked in on me taking a shit and told me to hit the bong
i'm totally cool with all the dick sucking you're doing down there, but as your brother i think i'm supposed to warn you our parents will be home in 5
Can I just say I love the fact that were in business with guys where I can write a hand job up hoes down text message
Fuck man, my Dad's been single so long I get him a year's sub to a porn site every year for for Father's Day
So I'm pretty sure I told every one at the party that "I'm going to fuck my pillow pets tonight?"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If you got me high enough to laugh at a ceiling fan until I shat my pants you should at least have the decency to buy me another pair
his penis was like the majestic horn of a unicorn and I came like a million trumpeting rainbows.
Please come over. It's a pajama and burn-2016-in-effigy party
I'm armed with nothing but $4 lip gloss gum and my phone. Ready to take on the fucking world.
My disney ticket is covered in lube, do you think they will accept it?
So my furniture is upside-down, two lamps are glued to the ceiling, and there is a kitten sleeping on Kyle's face. Please tell me what happened last night....
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