and when i put it inside her she yelled "welcome aboard!"
My toast was "here's to being positive, and testing negative... Cheers!"... after that chick gagged on her shot, everyone knew.... slut.
She was so adorably desperate I didn't have the heart to tell her I wasn't a lesbian. So now She's making waffles, may switch teams over this.
September 16th, captains log. I awoke in a daze, not sure of my location
The prescription for my birth control just blew away in the wind on my way back from the health center. It's like god wants me to get pregnant
I just sent you a google doc listing all the reasons why I should stop hooking up with him. Feel free to add to it.
its been so long even thinking about having a dick inside me makes me sore
when seducing a hipster, do you think taking a nude pic on a lomo-camera app would increase my chances? grainy off-colored boobs and telling him how much i like reading salinger?
My bra is still on the porch...I'm leaving it as a reminder to get my shit together.
It's not that I even wanna fuck these guys anymore, just cuddle that's all. My conscience has never been so proud.
He offered to take me to my appointment after breakfast then kind of just sat there and watched me get a papsmier. Most awkward first date ever.
They pay me enough to pretend to be either helpful, or heterosexual. If they want both I need one hell of a raise.
That's why i need nudes. Plutonic nudes.
it's 1:30pm and i'm eating cheese while i sext. i need hobbies
Change of plans & whoring it up tonight
Randomize
